Ba -ham Gateway to the south

We enter Bal-ham through the verden grasslands of battersea park
And at once we are aware that here is a land of happy contented people
Who go about their daily tasks in truly democratic spirit

This is busy high street, focal point of the towns activities
Note the quaint old stores whose frontage is covered 
in hand painted inscriptions
Everyone a rare example of native Bal-Ham art
Let us read some of them as our camera travels past

"Cooking apples choice eaters"
"A song to remember at the tantamount cinema"
"A suit to remember at Montague Moss"
"Masons conducted with decorum and taste"
"Fight tonight, bring your own paper"
"Rally thursday, Berkley Square"
"Viscountess Lewisham and Mrs Gerald Lang - Up the ruling classes"

This shows the manifold activities of Bal-ham's thriving community.
But in quiet corners we still find examples of the exquiste workmanship that Bal-ham craftsmen have made world famous.

Toothbrush holesmanship

"On my forge I carve the little holes on the top of toothbrushes. It is exciting work and my forefathers have been engaged in it since 1957. The little holes in the top are put in manually, in other words once a year.
I recently had the honour of demonstrating my craft before the Ooni of Ife. He stopped by one day for a couple of words. I did not understand either of them"

So much for Bal-Ham's industries. Now lets see a little more of the town.

Here is the great park, covering nearly half an acre. This where the children traditionally meet, by the limpid waters of the old drinking fountain. A drinking fountain that has for countless years, acrosss the vast Eaon's of time, given untold pleasure to man, woman and child.

Beside this fountain, donated by able councillor Quills, as long ago as 1928, the little ones sit around a trim nurse maid and listen spellbound and enchanted as she reads them a story.

"With one bound he was by her side. Nora felt his hot breath on his cheek as he ripped the thin silk from...."

We are now entering Old Bal-Ham. Time has past by this remote corner so shall we.

But Bal-Ham is not neglecting the cultural side. This is eugene Quill whose weekly recitals are attended by a vast concord of people - he has never had a lesson in his life.

Such is the enthusiasm of Bal-ham's music lovers, that they are subscribing to a fund to send Eugene to Italy or Vienna or anywhere.

Night falls on Bal-Ham. From Quills folly, Bal-Hams famous beauty spot, which stands nearly ten feet above sea level, a town is spread below us in a fairyland of glittering lights. Which are changing all the time.

Green, Amber, Red, Red and Amber and back to Green.

The night life is awakening.

The El-Morroco team room

"Hey Miss"
"Yes what do you want?"
"Pilchards"
"They're off dear"
"Oh - Baked Beans?"
"Off"
"Meat loaf salad"
"That's off too"
"Pot of tea?"
"No tea dear"
"Well Just milk then"
"Milks off"
"Roll and Butter?"
"No butter dear"
"Oh just a roll"
"Only bread love"
"I might as well just have stayed at home"
"Oh I don't know, does you good to have a fling occassionally"

And so the long draws on, the last straglers make their way home and the lights go out one by one as dawn approaches and the bell of St Quills parish church tolls ten O'Clock"

Bal-Ham Sleeps

And so we say farewell to this historic borough, with many pleasant memories and the words of C Quills Smith, Bal-Ham's own bard burning in our ears.

"Broad bossomed, bold, beclamed, benign. 
Lies Bal-Ham, four sqaure on the northern line. 
Matched by no marvel save in eastern seen
A rose red city half as gold as green

By country churchyard fearny fenn and meer
What Quills mute in glorious lies buried here
Oh stands the church clock at ten to three
And is there honey still for tea"

"Honeys off dear"

















